'Ooh look, Herons' Tim said as we peered into a pool of flamingos. It was going to be a long and educationally intriguing day. With military precision we got a gondola to the far end of San Diego zoo and worked our way back to the entrance.
I'm never too sure how I feel about zoos. The zoo has a breeding program for many endangered animals but when we turned a corner to see a brown beer pacing up and down a branch I felt sad - after all we had seen happy contented brown bears on the slopes of Whistler. 
On the money trail we were met by copulating apes, bum sniffing monkeys and resting orangutans. A few families moved away from the glass, eventually leaving a space for Tim and I to have a closer look. As I settled down, and a few seconds faster than my brain could engage, I asked Tim what the pair were up to. As Tim laughed I suddenly realised why the previous families had fled. 
The zoo map highlighted the lengths to which the average American (who also happens to be obese) will go to in order to reduce any levels of exercise to negligible levels. On cycling maps, climbs are clearly presented as a profile - allowing for you to plan the number of climbs you want to do in a day and for mental preparation. The zoo, however, stated ups and downs in line with showing a route devoid of any climb. In order to to allow someone to only ever walk down a hill they had even built a couple of escalators.
As we left the zoo 7 hours later, we saw a white man and crossed the road. I was beginning to wonder if this was not somewhat derogatory or at the very least discriminating to half of the population. Perhaps 'politically incorrect white man' would be more appropriate when shouting at the top of my voice. Why had the Americans not seen the sense in having a green man? Bar umpa lumpas, which as I write I am thinking actually have only green hair, there aren't such a race to offend.
At lunch we had given in to the extortion that is a zoological park eatery. It was actually pretty nice, albeit at the same cost as caviar (I should imagine), but as I tried to finish a soda that looked big enough to fit my head into, Tim told me to think of the children in Biafra . Realising a commonality to our childhoods we agreed we should think of the children in Ethiopia instead, as at least we could geographically place this country (well Tim could any way, and interestingly as I spell check this my computer hasn't even heard of Biafra).
Tim's trendy new converse trainers.
Which he is very proud of.
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